I am one of five children and was born and raised in Tokoroa, the 16th island of the Cook Islands. My family hails from the villages of Avatiu and Tupapa in Rarotonga, Nikaupara and Amuri in Aitutaki, and Ngatiarua in Atiu.
As I am New Zealand-born, I grew up speaking mainly English. Although my grandparents spoke their mother tongue at home, I could only reply in English. I’m not sure why I did not try to learn to speak it. I must admit when I was with my grandparents, my priorities as a child were not to learn the language but rather play games with my cousins. However, when it came time to read our Tatau on White Sundays, my grandmother made sure we knew how to speak like a real Cook Islander. I remember her telling me “You are not a papa’a (European)”.
It was through my grandparents, that I learnt to cherish my language and my heritage. I would sit with them at the dining table listening to the stories of their youth, speaking of their parents and family, and listening to their teachings in genealogy. Through them I learnt that I must not only take pride in where I come from, but who I come from. And the people I come from spoke a different language to me. That is a thought that often drives me to try to use my language today.
Regarding my language and my culture, it has been a difficult journey. Pursuing my dreams has meant I had to leave home, and with that, leaving the connection I have to my language. I did not speak my language much during my university years, as I thought I had no reason to. Looking back, I recognise that my very identity was the reason why I should’ve spoken it more. I was not alone in Dunedin, I had plenty of Cook Islands friends who I could’ve spoken to in Cook Islands Māori. Those are some years I am not particularly proud of.
After I graduated, I moved to Christchurch where I worked at the Hospital Dental Service. This move was driven by my passion for hospital dentistry, providing care to medically complex, special needs, paediatrics and other vulnerable groups. The Christchurch Hospital Dental Service was my dream job as a graduate, I wanted nothing else. I am forever grateful for the mentorship I received there. I made some lifelong friends. But something was missing. After I made my move to Waikato Hospital, I realised it was my Cook Islands people. At Waikato Hospital we see and treat many people from Tokoroa, and almost every day I have seen a Cook Islands name on my patient list. My attitude shifts as soon as I enter the room, speaking in Cook Islands Māori, using simple everyday terms, something I rarely did in Christchurch. This is where I currently am with my journey in learning my language. My end goal is to one day be working in the Cook Islands, where I hope to be speaking Cook Islands Māori as though it is my mother tongue.
Next year I intend to return to studies. I have applied to study for a Diploma in Public Health with the intent of one day becoming a dental public health specialist. I have witnessed firsthand the disparities in access to healthcare, the impact of environmental factors on health outcomes, and the barriers to health literacy faced by marginalised populations, such as my Cook Islands people. These experiences have fuelled my determination to pursue postgraduate study in public health as a means of enhancing my knowledge, skills, and impact in addressing these issues.
I am one of only two Cook Islands Māori dentists in New Zealand. One day I hope for there to be more. However, while I wait, I intend to at least help in building a legacy that prides my people.
Kia manuia.
